Devotion 152 - What Disappointment Reveals (from the the 'Becoming' devotional bible for Women, NCV)
"Anger is an emotion that destroys many things, including trust. Trust cannot be present when the heart is furious. I remember a time when my heart was a dark and angry place. I wondered where the woman went who loved her Lord, who loved people, and whose joy was considered contagious. I felt like a complete failure, and one night I poured myself out in the dark before the Lord. "Why am I so angry? Where did I go? I feel like I am losing me, Father. Please speak to my heart.
Out of the light, the Holy Spirit answered, "You are angry because you do not trust me. You had your own expectations, and those unmet expectations turned into disappointments, and disappointments into frustrations, and frustrations into anger."
I thought about what the Spirit had said, and I reflected on all the things I could identify as a source of frustration or anger. And you know what? He was right. I could track every single thing back to an unmet expectation - how I thought things should have gone, how a relationship was supposed to be, what my business should look like you get the picture. All the while, I was telling myself I wanted god's will, but in reality, I wanted God's will to fulfill my own hopes and expectations. Is the Lord asking you to loosen your fearful grip on an unmet expectation? Allow God to fill you with hopes, dreams, and expectations he has for your life."
This devotion helped me see a way through some things that I've been dealing with for most of my life. Trusting God has always been a biggy for me as my trust has been broken so many times by those around me. Through this devotion though, I can reflect on my past and ask God to help me move through this.
Something to ponder...
God Bless
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